So, I’m a cancer dad. Those of you who have supported my previous Pan Mass Challenge efforts and countless JimmyFund fundraising activities know the story, and the amazing outcome with my now 18-year-old son Tyler. Happy, Healthy, straight A student, varsity athlete and all-around pain in the ass. Exactly how it should be, says all my family and friends who have had an 18-year-old…
As with everything in life, time changes perspective and the story…
Along the way, we have met some amazing families, made friends, lost friends, and have seen miracles and tragedy strike, all because of cancer.
What I never expected was to receive a blubbering tear-filled phone call from a Mass Maritime classmate, fellow GE leadership program grad, former college football player, all-around tough guy, and great friend, Mark Serpa. “Hannah has Leukemia.. we are at the ER at Children’s hospital now waiting to be checked in…. What do I do??” We talked for an hour. He cried, I cried, I was reliving a nightmare that was never supposed to happen again.
My response was “I’ll be right there”. Of course, I was in Europe (like when Tyler got sick), and it took me 72 hours to get home, and flown back up to Boston Children’s. I spent the next 5 days sitting in the familiar window seat on 6 North staring at Mark and Michelle under the preface that I was staying until they told me to go, and I would do what ever they needed.
I watched as they went through the same shock and helpless yet hopeful routine that Paula and I went through 6 years earlier. Trying to find some control of the situation that, in reality, is completely out of control. You just haven’t accepted it at this point.
Mark was making spread sheets and graphs of Hannah’s blood work results in hopes of uncovering some secret trend that was going to tell him that his baby girl was going to be OK. Michelle, with the best Irish accent, was nurturing, feeding, cuddling and changing diapers, being the best mom, a daughter could hope for. And in between all this figuring out what the hell to do with all the food and toys people keep bringing…
As I sat in the window and watched, I realized some things:
- Mark and Michelle are Paula and me. A spitting image of my family thrust into a situation that we were completely unprepared for, and this could never, and was not ever supposed to happen to our perfect family.
- They had no idea how hard this was going to be on Hannah, Blair, themselves, and the people that love them. They didn’t need to know that day, they just needed to keep hearing that everything was going to be ok, and we all had their back.
- This is happening every day at Children’s, some prognoses are good like Hannah’s and Tyler’s, some are a complete tragedy.
- The fundraising and support from the JimmyFund was already helping my dear friends, and making Mark’s awful transition to a “Cancer Dad” a little easier.
- This bullshit must stop.
Why I ride.
This year I ride for Mark Serpa, Cancer Dad.
